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What Women Want--What Men Want: Why the Sexes Still See Love and Commitment So Differently

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Author: John Marshall Townsend
Publisher: Oxford University Press, USA
Category: Book

List Price: ~~$35.00~~
Buy Used: $3.91
You Save: $31.09 (89%)

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Media: Paperback
Number Of Items: 1
Pages: 304
Shipping Weight (lbs): 0.5
Dimensions (in): 8 x 5.4 x 0.7

ISBN: 0195131037
Dewey Decimal Number: 158
EAN: 9780195131031
ASIN: 0195131037

Publication Date: April 22, 1999
Availability: Usually ships in 1-2 business days

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Editorial Reviews:

Product Description
Following the work of E. O. Wilson, Desmond Morris, and David Buss, What Women Want--What Men Want offers compelling new evidence about the real reasons behind men's and women's differing sexual psychologies and sheds new light on what men and women look for in a mate, the predicament of marriage in the modern world, the relation between sex and emotion, and many other hotly debated questions.br Drawing upon 2000 questionnaires and 200 intimate interviews that show how our sexual psychologies affect everyday decisions, John Townsend argues against the prevailing ideologically correct belief that differences in sexual behavior are "culturally constructed." Townsend shows there are deep-seated desires inherited from our evolutionary past that guide our actions. In a fascinating series of experiments, men and women were asked to indicate preferences for potential mates based on their attractiveness and apparent economic status. Women overwhelmingly preferred expensively dressed men to more attractive but apparently less successful men, and men were clearly inclined to choose more attractive women regardless of their professional status. Townsend's studies also indicate that men are predisposed to value casual sex, whereas women cannot easily separate sexual relations from the need for emotional attachment and economic security. Indeed, wherever men possess sexual alternatives to marriage, and women possess economic alternatives, divorce rates will be high. In the concluding chapter, Townsend draws upon the advice of couples who have maintained their marriages over the years to suggest ways to survive our evolutionary predicament.br Lucidly and accessibly written, What Women Want--What Men Want shows us why we are the way we are and brings new clarity to one of the most intractable debates of our time.

Customer Reviews: Read 4 more reviews...

5 out of 5 stars

Evolutionary psychology made easy October 24, 2008
Mr.Townsend is both an accomplished writer and an able social scientist. This book states that there are some basic evolutionary traits that are particular to each one of the sexes. For example, men want to "score" as often as possible with the most beautiful and desirable women. To do so, they resort to different tactics ranging from false commitment promises to actual commitment at some degree. One typical trait of women is that they won't "marry down" in most instances. No matter how successful women may become, they rather be uncommitted than sharing their lives with an economically "unsuitable" man. These are but two examples of the series of traits that are associated, according to Mr. Townsend (and to other authors to be fair), to either sex. By reading the book you will find out those other interesting traits.br /br / The book postulates arise from interviews and similar studies on these peculiar gender related traits. The book have case stories that are lively written and make the book more pleasant to read. If you want to learn about men's and women's outlooks and psychological traits, this book will not disappoint you.

5 out of 5 stars

The most comprehensive book I've read on human sexual behavior. April 1, 2006
4 out of 7 found this review helpful

The most comprehensive book on human sexual behavior. It is written at a level that can be easily understood by most people. It should be required reading for everyone -- from high school and college students who are entering into the dating realm, to happily married couples who want a deeper understanding of their partners sexual psychology. This book provides individuals with a better understanding of the dynamics behind dating and why their partners act and desire the things they do. The people who have written negative reviews about this book are merely in denial about the realities of the human experience. This book provides valuable, validated information that is critical to understanding human behavior in both sexes. It allows the reader to understand and leverage information to make better informed decisions regarding lifestyle choice, mate selection, and relationship expectations.

1 out of 5 stars

rubbish November 4, 2003
4 out of 10 found this review helpful

This book is simplistic and reductionistic, and based on very stereotypical thinking (and not backed up with any credible science) the truth is ... there is so much variation in the genders .... some men are not so focused on a woman's appearance ... and there are some women out there who love young, sexy men and are not impressed by status (most of my college friends certainly fit this) ... do not waste your money on this simple, badly written trash ...

4 out of 5 stars

women want status; men want beauty -- January 19, 2002
11 out of 12 found this review helpful

If you're a woman over 30, less than a perfect ten, and wondering whether you'll ever find a good man, look no further. This book will confirm that you're doomed to spinsterhood. All men are looking for that beautiful twenty-year old blonde with the perfect body. Seriously, the basic premise of the book is that men prize a woman's youth physical attractiveness first and foremost (and almost to the exclusion of any other traits -- a woman's economic status, occupation, and to some extent, personality, are largely irrelevant to men). In choosing sexual partners and mates, men focus on physical attractiveness. Period. Women, on the other hand, look for economic and professional status and investment. A woman of any socioeconomic level wants to marry up and will often prefer to have a primary relationship with a higher status man who is married or involved with multiple women than to have a primary monogomous relationship with a lower status man. Men want to minimize their investment; women want to maximize a man's investment. Townsend explains why musicians and athletes have often had hundreds of sex partners, and typically have ten to twenty women whom they can call at any given time for commitment free, investment-free sex. Townsend creates serious doubt that men in high status positions will be faithful in relationships.pIt seems that the vast majority of the individuals interviewed quoted are twenty-something medical students, becoming aware of their status for the first time. They will have nothing to do with the unattractive, overweight women in their med school class, particularly when the universe of chirpies (nurses, therapists, etc.) are available interested. The other group of men interviewed are, on the whole, high status men, many of whom engage in polygyny (multiple relationships during the same time frame with a variety of women).pThis book was interesting, and filled with quotations from the interviewees, although it went on on on --reinforcing the conclusion that draws in the first few chapters, quoting one med student who sounds very similar to the next med student. Men want youth beauty. Women want investment status. pMy guess is that some readers would bristle at the generalizations in this book -- though they undoubtedly ring true. The text doesn't contain a significant amount of commentary editorialization; it just presents the interview results in a readable fashion.

4 out of 5 stars

A Fine Work from the Anthropologic Point of View July 26, 1999
1 out of 3 found this review helpful

I like the way Townsend makes the case for anthropologic givens for the differences between men and women, and I like the way he challenges some of the past work of Margaret Mead for her unwillingness to use data that did not fit her model, but at the same time admiring her for admiting her mistake years later.

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