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Trapped in the Mirror

Trapped in the Mirror

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Author: Elan Golomb
Publisher: Harper Paperbacks
Category: Book

List Price: $13.95
Buy Used: $0.65
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Media: Paperback
Number Of Items: 1
Pages: 272
Shipping Weight (lbs): 0.7
Dimensions (in): 9 x 6 x 0.8

ISBN: 0688140718
Dewey Decimal Number: 616.8585
EAN: 9780688140717
ASIN: 0688140718

Publication Date: March 28, 1995
Availability: Usually ships in 1-2 business days
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Condition: COVER IS WORN, PAGES ARE TANNING DUE TO AGE, NICE READABLE COPY! Good reading copy. Expedited orders placed before 3 PM EST ship the SAME DAY. Automatic Upgrade to Priority Mail shipping on U.S. orders over $40. Multiple books ordered from Look at a Book in a single checkout will help you reach the $40 threshold for your free Priority Mail Upgrade! Satisfaction Guaranteed!

Similar Items:

  • Children of the Self-Absorbed: A Grown-up's Guide to Getting over Narcissistic Parents
  • Why Is It Always About You? : The Seven Deadly Sins of Narcissism
  • The Wizard of Oz and Other Narcissists: Coping with the One-Way Relationship in Work, Love, and Family
  • Toxic Parents: Overcoming Their Hurtful Legacy and Reclaiming Your Life
  • The Narcissistic Family: Diagnosis and Treatment

Editorial Reviews:

Product Description

In this compelling book, Elan Golomb identifies the crux of the emotional and psychological problems of millions of adults. Simply put, the children of narcissist -- offspring of parents whose interest always towered above the most basic needs of their sons and daughters -- share a common belief: They believe they do not have the right to exist.

The difficulties experienced by adult children of narcissists can manifest themselves in many ways: for examples, physical self-loathing that takes form of overeating, anorexia, or bulimia; a self-destructive streak that causes poor job performance and rocky personal relationships; or a struggle with the self that is perpetuated in the adult's interaction with his or her own children. These dilemmas are both common and correctable, Dr. Golomb tells us.

With an empathic blend of scholarship and case studies, along with her own personal narrative of her fight for self, Dr. Golomb plumbs the depths of this problem, revealing its mysterious hold on the affairs of otherwise bright, aware, motivated, and worthy people. Trapped in the Mirror explores.

  • the nature of the paralysis and lack of motivation so many adults feel
  • stress and its role in exacerbating childhood wrongs
  • why do many of our relationships seem to be "reruns" of the past
  • how one's body image can be formed by faulty parenting
  • how anger must be acknowledge to be overcome
  • and, most important, how even the most traumatized self can be healed.

Rooted in a profoundly humanist traditional approach, and suffused with the benefit of the latest knowledge about intrafamily relationships, Trapped in the Mirror offers more than the average self-help book; it is truly the first self-heal book for millions.




Customer Reviews:   Read 92 more reviews...

1 out of 5 stars Author Still Trapped   August 11, 2008
What a mess of a book! How this poorly written book by this self-centered and offensive author ever found a publisher is a mystery. Elan's anger comes across loudly, clearly and uncomfortably. I imagine the author as tedious at a "cocktail party" given her penchant for probing and analyzing all her acquaintances and coming up, remarkably, with the same diagnosis each time. The book read like one unconnected or tenuously connected rant to another. Much of the language was ambiguous. I often read sentences and paragraphs over and over trying to comprehend just what Elan was attempting to convey. In some cases, the premise was so poorly constructed it evaded this reader entirely. Readers seeking to understand narcissism and equip themselves with survival tools are better served by author Sam Vaknin; Narcissistic Lovers by Zayn and Dibble and especially by Wizard of Ox and Other Narcissists.


5 out of 5 stars Enlightening and Disturbing   June 11, 2008
I got this book on the recommendation of a friend and am not disappointed. Just depressed. Well, not exactly, and I haven't finished it yet, in spite of reading until 4:30 AM last night. It's quite descriptive of the narcissist's character and his/her effect on his/her children. I've been assured that I will be given tools in the book to work with these issues and am looking forward to finishing it. I feel confident rating it at this point because I find it so compelling and enlightening.


5 out of 5 stars Rich, indepth study of narcisssism   March 11, 2008
 1 out of 1 found this review helpful

I have been searching for some time to find a readable book on this subject and how to understand how living with a narcisstic parent has affected my life. This is the book! Golomb takes a psychoanalytic approach that is very helpful in understanding the development of this personality disorder and how it affects others. As a child of a narcissist, it was painful to read but helpful in understanding how this has affected my life and relationships. A clearer understanding has allowed for personal transformation to occur.


4 out of 5 stars Snapshots of Reflections   March 6, 2008
 6 out of 6 found this review helpful

Some of the common criticisms I've read about this book are its lack of practical advice and somewhat personal focus. To compare it to more recent books on narcissism and deride its shortcomings is somewhat unfair, as there is an immense amount of useful information and observation here. It was the first book on narcissism/NPD that I read, and many of the statements in the book hit home with an unusual degree of emotional impact. The case descriptions are extremely useful - a person probably won't find an exact reflection of themselves in there, but the various aspects that do seem relevant can be combined into some startling insights about the self, and the motivations and mechanisms that one might normally think are otherwise "conscious", or "just the way I am".

Sometimes "just the way we are" is how we have been made, not how we REALLY are.

Golomb also combines the information provided with her own personal struggle to overcome the effects of narcissistic wounding. This is going to be something that not every reader will like. Some will like the emotional honesty and think it relevant; others will find it distracting and too subjective. To each their own. Each time I have read the book, I did notice my attention wandering more after the half-way mark. Perhaps the latter sections of the book could be more tightly edited, but I don't feel this detracts from the first half, which is really good.
In any case, it's not the sort of book that you should read all in one sitting, and it helps to keep close attention on your own reactions to some of the words as they are read. Skim reading certainly doesn't encourage the sort of introspection needed to really benefit from a book like this!

I don't know if I would recommend this as THE book about narcissism/NPD, but it certainly should be on the reading list of anybody with more than a passing interest in the topic. You might be surprised at what you find "Trapped in the Mirror"!



2 out of 5 stars Lots of "stories" but not much to glean from them   February 18, 2008

I found this book to be very disappointing. While there were some informative bits here and there, too much of the book was filled with stories... "stories" about people that are narcissists or who have someone in their life that is. And through all the stories, I didn't feel there was anything to learn. After reading 1/3 of the book, I flipped through the rest, looking for any nuggets, and found very few... certainly not enough to read the book completely from beginning to end.


Copyright 2007 White Hat Communications.
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